Category Archives: Media

A Kidney For Cathy Talmadge

2020 was bad for many Westporters.

It was even worse for Cathy Talmadge.

Five years ago, Cathy’s health started a mysterious decline. The avid swimmer, gardener, environmentalist, traveler, reader and cook could barely get out of bed, much less work in her gardens, walk her golden retriever Riley, or whip up dinner with husband Tom.

After many visits to medical specialists, Cathy was diagnosed with a rare form of sarcoidosis. The debilitating autoimmune disease ravaged her organs. Now in stage 4 kidney failure, she requires a live donor transplant as quickly as possible. 

Cathy Talmadge

Cathy — beloved by many for her work with Wakeman Town Farm, Earthplace. Sherwood Island State Park and the RTM — was put on donation lists around the country. Unfortunately, it could take years before a kidney became available.

She was told too that dialysis might wreak havoc on her body. She could become very sick — possibly unable to have a transplant.

Family members were tested, but none were a match.

A group of friends is now getting the word out. With the clock ticking, they’ve devised a no-holds-barred campaign. Today, longtime friend and colleague Christy Colasurdo and a team of local volunteers launch A Kidney for Cathy. They want everyone to know her story.

And they want everyone reading this to share it far and wide. Somewhere in the world, they know, a life-saving donor is waiting.

The idea for the campaign was born after Christy’s friend Kira Krieger Senders secured a living kidney donor for her father through a creative multimedia campaign.

Christy was also moved by the ALS Pepper Challenge closer to home. It spread the word about Westport icon Patty’s Habestroh’s condition, raised more than $650,000 for research, and received national media attention. 

Nearly two-thirds of all live kidney donors come from marketing campaigns on Facebook and other social media platforms. That’s the focus of this campaign. 

Organizers say, “Anyone can help the campaign go viral by following our  Facebook and Instagram pages, liking posts, and visiting the A Kidney for Cathy website to learn more about becoming a kidney donor.

“Sharing the online posts will spread the message far and wide. The viral power of social media can literally save Cathy’s life.” 

A quick, confidential survey assesses whether an individual might be a good candidate to donate.

While helping Cathy, the campaign will also shine a spotlight on the 114,927 patients currently on a kidney or liver transplant waiting list in the US.

Christy says. “A big part of this will be about educating the public. I was blown away to learn that Cathy can receive a kidney transplant from someone who is not a direct match. Cathy just needs a kind and healthy person to donate a kidney on her behalf.

“If not a match, that kidney goes to another recipient, which then enables the National Kidney Registry to put Cathy in the recipient pool to identify her perfect match. One donation inspired by Cathy will save two lives.”

Christy also learned that kidney transplants are now done laparoscopically, through a small navel incision. Donors typically spend only 2 or 3 nights in the hospital, followed by a quick return to full health and athletic pursuits.

“Donors overwhelmingly report that the most lasting effect is the good feeling they get from power of their gift. Most say that they would donate again in a heartbeat,” Christy adds.

A plea from Cathy Talmadge’s daughter.

Christy and other team members — including website designer (and Staples High School sophomore) James Dobin-Smith, graphic artist Miggs Burroughs, social media consultant Terri Piekara and Wakeman Town Farm co-chair Liz Milwe –ask everyone reading this to pass it along via their social networks. A toolkit on the website includes graphics to post or share

Questions about donating a kidney? Want to get more involved? Email  Akidney4cathy@gmail.com

MLK Celebration: A Week Of Introspection And Inspiration

This year more than ever, it’s important to celebrate the life and legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

And — now more than ever — it’s vital to do it on more than just Martin Luther King Day.

Layla F. Saad

The town is already gearing up for next Sunday’s conversation with Layla F. Saad, author of the compelling “Me and White Supremacy.” The livestreamed event is set for 12 noon. (Click here to register. Click here for more details.)

But that’s just the start of a week-long series of virtual events. For the first time, Westport is expanding its MLK celebrations beyond a single keynote.

Rev. Alison J. Patton of Saugatuck Congregational Church says, “In recent years we have shifted the focus of the Dr. King celebration from a remembrance of his groundbreaking leadership to an occasion to deepen our understanding of the continuing impact of systemic racism. There’s a need to equip ourselves to more effectively unmask and dismantle racism in our lives and community.”

Saad’s talk will be followed 2 days later by a panel discussion on “Me and White Supremacy: What Can I Do Next?”

The January 19 session (7 p.m.) focuses on the process outlined in Saad’s best-selling workbook, a 28-day challenge “to combat racism, change the world and become a good ancestor.” Click here to register.

The week culminates with “New Works/New Voices,” an evening of original monologues in response to Saad’s “Me and White Supremacy” (Thursday, January 21, 7 p.m.). It’s a world premiere, with Gracy Brown, Tenisi Davis, Tamika Pettway and Terrence Riggins sharing new works exploring themes surrounding racial justice. Click here to register.

Monologue authors ready for world premiere.

There’s more next month. February will include many opportunities for “profound personal engagement on the impact of white supremacy and privilege,” says TEAM Westport’s Bernicestine McLeod Bailey. Details will be announced soon.

TEAM Westport is co-sponsoring the Martin Luther King celebration, with the Westport Libraray, Westport Country Playhouse, Westport Weston Interfaith Council and Westport Weston Interfaith Clergy.

Remembering Elise Maclay

Elise Maclay — a poet, writer, foodie, elegant dresser and accomplished traveler — died peacefully January 5, in her Westport home by Long Island Sound. She was 95.

She spent her final days looking over the water, surrounded by family and with a photo of her beloved husband David at her side.

Elise attended the College of William & Mary on a full scholarship. She majored in English, graduated Phi Beta Kappa, and served as class poet until her death.

Elise had a successful early career in the heady Mad men days of advertising. She commuted to New York from Connecticut with 2 small children at home, gracefully navigating the mandatory 3-martini lunches in an otherwise male world.

She wrote copy for the prestigious BMW account — and once posed as the model for an ad she created, when the talent did not show up.

Elise Maclay

Elise’s poetry appeared in publications like Nature magazine. Her “Walk Softly” is often quoted by nature lovers.

She wrote 2 books of prose poems, and collaborated on 5 other books with artist Bev Doolittle.

Elise’s poetry, and interest in Native American, wildlife and nature themes, complements Doolittle’s “camouflage” art.

Elise sourced fine food locally, long before chefs used cilantro and kale. A carnivore, she enjoyed great food robustly. Her culinary taste and writing gifts led to another career. For over 25 years she was Connecticut Magazine’s food critic. She captured tastes, ambiance and the personalities and dreams of chefs.

The number of exquisite meals delivered to her home in recent months is a testament to the loyalty and gratitude of many chefs, young and old, whom she discovered and celebrated.

But her true passion was travel — preferably adventures to far and exotic locales — with her husband. She hiked Machu Picchu, explored the Himalayas and climbed Mt. Kenya in a blizzard.

She, her niece LeeLee and dear friend Fi explored the Caribbean islands, Italy and Portugal as recently as last February.

Closer to home, she was a beloved presence at her family’s summer home on Cape Cod. She walked the beaches, swam, read by the fire, and regaled generations of family and friends with adventures and cherished memories.

Her spirit is carried on by her son Gary Gibbs, his wife Kaija and their 4 children; stepson Bill Maclay, his wife Alex, and their 2 sons; stepson David Maclay Jr., his wife Juliet and their 2 sons; cousn Joyce Haun, and an extended network of neighbors, chefs and friends from all walks of life.

She was predeceased by her husband David, son Brian Gibbs and stepdaughter Sherry Maclay.

Elise would want all to know David’s final words, quoting Tennessee Williams: “Make voyages. Attempt them. There’s nothing else.”

Memorials will be held post-COVID in Westport and Chatham, Massachusetts.

Donations in Elise’s name may be made to the CT Hospitality Employee Relief Fund or Save the Sound.

(Hat tip: Judith Hart)

Roundup: Y’s Hikers, David Waldman, Amazon’s Gatsby, More


COVID has caused many organizations to move meetings online.

You can’t do that with a hiking club, though. So the Y’s Men group has adapted. They meet in smaller numbers now. They maintain strict social distance — 8 feet, just to be sure. They wear masks when they assemble.

But they still get their exercise. And their miles.

Twice a week, Chris Lewis leads 10 to 15 hikers. He knows all the trails, throughout the county.

Wednesday hikes are 2 hours long. Friday’s are more strenuous, and can take up to 3. Only heavy rain or extremely slippery conditions stop the Y’s Men.

In addition, “walkers” meet nearly every day. They avoid difficult trail conditions.

This may not be the Y’s Men’s motto. But it should be: “COVID? Take a hike!”

(Hat tip: Michael Hehenberger)

A recent hike at Trout Brook Preserve, owned and managed by Aspetuck Land Trust.
Tom Johnson (3rd from left) is a Y’s Men hiker and ALT member. (Photo/Sal Mollica)


Dave Briggs is one of the best interviewers around. He brings out the best in his subjects, in a relaxed, fun and insightful way. His Instagram Live chats are always intriguing.

And I’m not just saying that because I was a recent guest.

Today (Wednesday, January 6, 4 p.m.), he’ll chat with David Waldman. They’ll talk about the commercial realtor’s work developing Bedford Square and the west bank of the Saugatuck River, bringing Barnes & Noble downtown, and much more.

Head to @WestportMagazine on Instagram. You’ll be entertained — and learn a lot.


“Gatsby in Connecticut: The Untold Story” is ready for prime time.

Or at least, Amazon Prime.

The 70-minute movie by Robert Steven Williams — starring Sam Waterston and Keir Dullea, covering F. Scott and Zelda Fitzgerald’s formative summer in Westport — is available on the streaming service.

The New Yorker called it one of the best films of 2020. Click here, and judge for yourself. (Hat tip: David Meth)


David Tarqueno died on December 24 at Norwalk Hospital, from complications of COVID-19. He was 61 years old.

His obituary says, “David left behind an incredible number of friends who loved him. His personality was like no other. His presence could light up a room. His smile, his laughter and his humor will remain with every heart he touched.

“David loved fishing — he was out there every fishing season opening day. Nature and animals were an important part of his life. He was devoted to his family and friends. That devotion was selfless, his trust boundless, and love endless.”

The Staples High School graduate is survived by his parents, Joseph and Marianne Tarqueno; sister Lisa Tarqueno-Crawford; brother Peter Tarqueno, and his beloved dog Harry.

David Tarqueno


And finally … today, the Electoral College meets. Will Vice President Pence do what Joe Biden did as vice president 4 years ago (and Al Gore, George H.W. Bush and many others before him), affirming the legitimate winner of the election 2 months earlier?

Or will American democracy be launched into a parallel universe, one in which lunacy rules and losers’ temper tantrums make us the laughingstock of the world?

Fingers crossed!

Roundup: Basso, More


Flying fearlessly in the face of the pandemic, another new restaurant opens in Westport today.

Basso Restaurant & Wine Bar takes over the old Matsu Sushi on Jesup Road, behind the old Restoration Hardware (soon to be the new Barnes & Noble).

Chef Renato Donzelli has moved Basso from Norwalk to here. The 2-story space is larger, there is seating outdoors, and there’s a wood-fired pizza oven too.

According to CTbites, Donzelli was born in Venezuela and raised in Naples. His menu is Mediterranean flavored, with a Venezuelan influence. Click here for their full story.

(Photo collage courtesy of Stephanie Webster/CTbites.com)


And finally …  Gerry Marsden, the leader and namesake of Gerry and the Pacemakers, died yesterday in London, of a blood infection. He was 78.

The band was from Liverpool, was managed by Brian Epstein, and for a while was the Beatles’ biggest rivals in the city. They were part of what the US called “the British Invasion” of the mid-1960s. They had several big rock hits here, like “I Like It” and “How Do You Do It?”

They were known for ballads too, like “Ferry Cross the Mersey,” “Don’t Let the Sun Catch You Crying” and “I’ll Be There.”

But they’re best known — and will be for generations more — for an odd choice of a pop hit. “You’ll Never Walk Alone” — from Rodgers & Hammerstein’s 1945 “Carousel.”

It became the anthem of Liverpool’s soccer team, and was adopted by other clubs around the world. The Staples High School girls team plays it before every match. Watch the video below, and you’ll see why it may be best sports song of all time.

Roundup: Lucille Ball, Norwalk Youth Symphony, More

Happy New Year. Congratulations to us all. We made it out of 2020.

There’s no looking back now!


Every new year brings hope — and a fresh start — to Westport.

That’s the same thing Lucy Ricardo and her friend Ethel Mertz wanted 60 years ago. “I Love Lucy”‘s stars had just moved to the country.

And this is what the country saw, on the top-rated comedy show:

I’d heard about the photo, and searched all month for it — to no avail.

Providentially, late yesterday, Wendy May emailed me. She figured I already had it, but figured what the heck.

Amazing! 2021 is already starting out on the right foot.


Over 30 Westport 4th through 12th graders perform with the Norwalk Youth Symphony. They did not miss a beat this fall. Despite the pandemic, the 65-year-old institution added chamber music ensembles, master classes and lessons in music theory, to its regular program of 5 orchestras.

This month, the NYS offers new seminars for high school students and adults. Topics include “Women and the American Sound,” “The Roaring Harlem Renaissance,” “1,000 Years of Music in 60 Minutes,” and “Alma Mahler and Her Times.”

Ahead: a seminar for parents on motivating young musicians.

Young musicians now play remotely from their homes in sections by instrument. It’s different — but they and their instructors have risen to the challenge.

For more information on Norwalk Youth Symphony click here, call 203-866-4100, or email nysed@optonline.net.


And finally … “Do You Love Me” like you’ve never heard it before!

 

Roundup: Twilight Zone, Top Restaurants, More


One of my favorite New Year’s traditions is the SyFy channel’s “Twilight Zone” marathon.

It airs December 31 and January 1 — one great, thought-provoking, stand-the-test-of-time episode after another.

Rod Serling began writing and introducing his stories while he lived in Westport — right down the street from my family, in fact, on High Point Road.

Some were influenced by this suburban, post-war town. And “A Stop at Willoughby” — with a train conductor calling out to a time traveler, “Next stop: Westport!” — is on tomorrow (Thursday, December 31) at 9:20 p.m. Click here for the full schedule.


Congratulations to The Cottage and Kawa Ni — and their owners, Brian Lewis and Bill Taibe respectively. Both are included in Connecticut Magazine’s list of the Top 15 restaurants in the state.

That means our town includes more than 13% of all the best restaurants!


Did you miss last night’s full Full Cold Moon?

Wendy Crowther sure didn’t.

(Photo/Wendy Crowther)


And finally … influential bluegrass and new acoustic singer/guitarist Tony Rice died Saturday in North Carolina. He was 69.

 

Young Library Users Discover Diverse Characters

There are 3 ways to think about fiction.

Books can be mirrors, reflecting our own experiences.

They can be windows, allowing us to look at new worlds. 

Or they can be sliding glass doors. Exceptional authors help us actually walk through, and enter other people’s lives.

Because young people come to literature with great curiosity and openness, children’s literature is exceptionally important. Too often though, the characters young readers see are too much like themselves.

Or nowhere like them at all.

In an effort to broaden the pages available to local child, tween and teenage readers, the Westport Library and Public School’s PTA have teamed up on an exciting initiative.

“Finding Diverse Books” — a curated list of the Library’s collection — features long-underrepresented characters. Specifically, they’re Asian, Latinx, Black, LGBTQ, Native American, people with disabilities, and those who are neurodiverse (on the autism spectrum, or with similar different abilities).

Selections are broken into levels: K-2nd grade, 3rd-5th, middle school and high school.

“Can I Touch Your Hair?” presents paired poems about topics like family dinners, sports, recess and more.

It’s part of a national “We Need Diverse Books” project, begun by authors and the publishing industry. The Library’s “Own Voices” program is an offshoot of that.

The Westport PTA’s Committee on Diversity, Equity and Inclusion has championed the effort. Library director of youth services Mary Parmelee is an enthusiastic supporter.

She points to research showing that when children read books deeply and closely, their brain lights up in the same area as if they were actually living that experience.

“Parents understand Westport is an insular world,” Parmelee says. “They’re asking for these books. And they’re checking them out.”

The youth librarian reels off a wide sampling of popular topics: books about Black children’s place in America, trans youth’s experiences in high school, Latinx families and life with OCD.

“Pashima” is about a girl who thinks her mother’s homeland exists only in her imagination.

Yet many simply include diverse characters as part of everyday life. One features a little Black girl whose parents try to get her to sleep in her own bed.

“For years, these types of characters were not part of the books being published,” Parmelee notes.

Now they are.

“We hope they can help nurture a society that is connected through a shared humanity,” says PTA DEI committee co-chair Ngassam Ngnoumen.

Check ’em out!

(Click here for the Westport Library’s “Diverse Books Need Us” page. Click here for the Library’s #OwnVoices Resource Guide.)

Westport Values Transform A New York Co-op

Earlier this month, the New York Times Real Estate section examined the challenges that coop buildings face during the pandemic.

The lead focused on Lori Levine van Arsdale. She’s the board president of a 5 -unit cooperative near Gramercy Park. Owners there have not always played nice.

Lori is also an 8-year resident of Westport. Her experience here — with great neighbors who look out for each other — has inspired her to make her city residence a more friendly place too.

That was not mentioned in the Times story. But the other day, she talked about it for “06880.”

Lori grew up in New York. She’s owned her co-op for 15 years, and loves the neighborhood.

When she she married her husband Jan 8 years ago, he’d lived in Westport for nearly a decade. They blended their families — she had 2 dogs; he had 2 dogs and 4 kids — and bought a new home. It’s off Park Lane, behind Trader Joe’s.

The van Arsdales (from left): Jansen with Kipper, Stedman, Carolynn with Casey, Jane, Jan with Suki, and Lori.

Many of their neighbors are older than the van Arsdales. Yet right from the start — when a woman brought herbs from her garden — Lori felt welcomed.

Everyone socialized, celebrated birthdays, lent leaf blowers. A neighbor called Lori once in New York, when she spotted an intruder in Lori’s back yard. The Van Arsdales’ stepsons shoveled neighbors’ driveways.

When COVID struck, Lori and Jan spent most of her time in New York. Westport neighbors checked in by phone. One told Lori that her stepchildren — 24, 22, 20 and 18 years old — were doing great. One had offered to go food shopping for homebound neighbors.

“That’s the way living should be,” Lori says. “I wondered why it wasn’t happening in my 5-unit brownstone.”

Owners in the self-managed 1851 building did not get along. When 3 units came on the market, Lori decided things could change. She ran for president, and won.

Lori Levine van Arsdale on the steps of her Gramercy Park co-op. (Photo/Katherine Marks for the New York Times)

She had a long conversation with the remaining owners about working cooperatively, and showing each other kindness and appreciation for all the extra work and effort needed to make their units a home.

She brought her Westport sensibility to the new owners too. Neighborliness became the norm. Her husband shoveled the sidewalk and steps; another owner did the patio.

The co-op bought 2 outdoor heaters for the back yard. They added a table and pop-up gazebo, so people could eat together outside.

“It’s lovely now,” Lori says. “It’s like house living in a communal environment.”

Adapting suburban values to urban living has changed the dynamics of her building. “I’ll never again come home to contentious people,” she says.

She’s changed her views on city life in general too. “This is what everyone should do for someone else. I’ve lived in high rises, where the only interaction you have is with the doorman — not even the people on your floor. It shouldn’t be that way.”

Meanwhile, Lori remains connected to Westport. This is where the family celebrates Hanukkah, Christmas and New Years (it’s the van Arsdales’ anniversary).

“When we blended our family, we wanted everyone to really feel at home,” she says. “We’ve created a home there. Westport has really rubbed off on us.”

Lori laughs. “From the outside, it must have looked like I was living a ‘Sex in the City’ life. Suburbia to me meant Westchester. I always thought Connecticut would be stuffy. But Westport isn’t. It’s charming.”

COVID has caused many city residents to move here, she notes. She hopes they find this to be a great community too.

But — unless they keep their co-op — they can’t bring Westport life back to New York the way she did.

Roundup: F. Scott And Zelda, Christmas Scenes, More


New York Adventure Club is headed to the ‘burbs.

A special webinar on January 14 (5:30 p.m. to 7 p.m.) brings viewers — from anywhere in the world — to Westport. The topic F. Scott and Zelda Fitzgerald’s summer here.

Robert Steven Williams — director of “Gatsby in Connecticut,” one of the New Yorker’s best films of 2020 — will talk about the author’s background; an overview of Westport in the 1920s (Prohibition was not always prohibitive), and the town’s influence on The Great Gatsby. He’ll share video clips too, and never-before-seen photos of Westport and New York from the ’20s.

Williams hosts a Q-and-A afterward too. Click here for tickets. (They include access to the full replay for one week.) (Hat tip: Debbie Hoult)


The sun broke through (very) briefly late yesterday afternoon. Here’s how one person spent Christmas:

(Photo/Pippa Bell Ader)


Also seen yesterday:

Mark Mathias reports that a hawk visited his backyard, and landed on the bird feeder.  “S(he) regularly fluffed his feathers and looked around, presumably waiting for his Christmas stocking … or a snack,” Mark says.

“Upon flying away, the smaller birds quickly came back to our bird feeder. We saw the hawk again later in the afternoon, when the other birds understandably made themselves scarce. Made a pretty interesting sight.”

(Photo/Mark Mathias)


And K.T. Oslin — a “pioneering country singer-songwriter whose biggest hits gave voice to the desires and trials of female baby boomers on the cusp of middle age” — died Monday. She was 78. Causes of death were Parkinson’s and COVID.

Her biggest hits included “’80s Ladies” — called “an anthem for a generation of women” by the New York Times — and “Do Ya,” a “poignant meditation … on the ebb and flow of midlife vulnerability and desire.”