Tag Archives: mental health

Rhone Arriving In Westport

When I say “men’s apparel,” you probably don’t think “wellness.”

And you certainly don’t think “mental health.”

But Rhone does.

They’re a “premium men’s wellness brand that creates best in class performance-driven apparel engineered for an active lifestyle.”

They use their platform and products to address complex issues men face. Rhone raises awareness around the mental health crisis, provides men with tools and resources to navigate relationships — and sells a line of versatile clothes along the way.

Next month, Rhone comes to Westport.

They’ll open at 7 Main Street, the former Loft/Lou & Grey location. It will be their flagship Connecticut store, one of about a dozen nationwide. They also sell at all Equinox locations, plus Nordstrom, Bloomingdale’s, Dillard’s, and more than 350 gyms and specialty shops.

Nate Checketts

But Rhone is clearly a Connecticut company. Co-founder and CEO Nate Checketts was a football star at New Canaan High School (Class of 2001).

“You meet the best people in this state,” he says. “They’re in high-profile jobs, but they’re also very involved in their communities. And then on the side, they do triathlons.”

He’s a huge Westport fan too. He knows the town well, from the days when he mother took him and his 5 siblings shopping on Main Street, and to the water.

Checketts — whose father Dave was a CEO or owner of the Utah Jazz; New York Knicks, Rangers and Liberty, and Madison Square Garden, among others — went the “traditional Fairfield County route” of finance and consulting.

But at Brigham Young University he picked up the entrepreneurial bug. He was involved in an early online food ordering platform.

A stint at National Football League headquarters convinced him he was “not a corporate guy.” But it was a great place to learn how a successful corporation works. “I kept my eyes open all the time,” Checketts says.

His mother’s Christmas gift of Lululemon sweatpants to the extended family sparked a discussion with his brother-in-law. “Should guys be wearing this brand?” they wondered.

For a year, they talked on train rides to New York about creating a “best in class brand that men would be proud to wear.”

Rhone shirt and shorts.

At the same time Checketts was concerned with some of the messages about masculinity that his young sons were absorbing from society. He wanted to find a way to show them that “men can do good things in life without an overly machismo sense of self,” he says.

“There can be a balance: kindness, acceptance, and also physical pursuits, and taking care of their body and mind.”

Though men are more apt to commit suicide than women, they are less likely to seek therapy for mental health issues. Checketts has friends who have struggled; he recently lost a friend to suicide.

So — along with the shirts, hoodies, jackets, vests, pants, shorts, boxers, belts, shoes, socks, hats, bags and wallets Rhone sells — they offer signature programs like “Mind & Muscle.” They’re 25-minute workouts, followed by group therapy.

That’s just one of the ways Checketts says Rhone will be involved in the Westport community. And the town has already reached out to him.

Celebrity trainer Eric Johnson invited Checketts to a session. Television personality Dave Briggs asked how he could help.

The CEO is excited to open in Westport. So is the corporate staff, at Rhone’s Stamford headquarters.

Interior of an already-open Rhone store.

Meanwhile, about that name …

“The Rhône River starts at a Swiss glacier, and runs through France,” Checketts explains.

“I lived there for a few years. I loved the region. It was part of the Roman Empire, on the trade route. Van Gogh painted it.

“The Rhône River is all about aesthetics and function. Just like our clothes look great, and are also deeply functional.”

(“06880” is your source for local businesses — and the stories behind them. Please click here to support our work. Thank you!)

Roundup: Depression, Dumb Driving, Club 203 …

“Is My Teen Just Moody? An Overview on Adolescent Depression” is the depressing — but very important — title of a Westport Public Schools’ workshop.

Set for November 3 (7 p.m., Bedford Middle School auditorium), it offers parents ideas for distinguishing “normal” teenage mood swings from symptoms of something more serious.

The event explores signs and symptoms of clinical depression, and offers treatment options.

Presenter Elizabeth Cotter of Effective School Solutions ha over 20 years’ experience as a therapist, program director and in clinical leadership roles.

=====================================================

Traffic was normal — that is to say, busy — yesterday at noon.

Pat Prenderville was 5th in line on Imperial Avenue, waiting for the Post Road/Myrtle Avenue light.

Suddenly, the driver of a white Audi pulled in front of all the cars waiting in Pat’s line, and zoomed to the front.

In the left lane.

And proceeded to wait there — now first in line — until the light changed.

The very entitled white Audi. (Photo/Pat Prenderville)

The Very Very Very Important Driver then headed straight across, onto Myrtle.

“It’s amazing they weren’t hit by cars turning onto Imperial,” Pat says.

It’s also amazing that I’m not amazed anymore to hear — and see — stunts like this one.

PS: It was lunchtime, so this was not a teenage driver.

And you wonder why kids drive like they do.

======================================================

Club 203 — Westport’s new social group for adults with disabilities — had its second event this week.

Once again, it was a smashing success.

Attendees, their guests and volunteers came dressed for Halloween. Trunks were decorated, and filled with treats, Scary movie clips played on the Remarkable Theater screen, and there was dancing and games for all.

As they did at their first outing, Club 203 members greeted old friends, met new ones, and had a blast..

Next up: Gaming and Pizza Night (November 19, Toquet Hall). For more information, click here.

Club 203 members Jamie Taylor and Andreas Wagner enjoy the Halloween party.

======================================================

With nearly 300 members, Staples’ Service League of Boys is the high school’s largest club.

They spend most meetings planning events. But this week they Jay Paretzky of Westport Volunteer Emergency Medical Services led hands-on CPR and AED instruction for the teenagers — and their parents.

Other meetings are “working” sessions. For example, SLOBs will pack and deliver hundreds of snack bags for Bridgeport schoolchildren.

SLOBs has a great reputation, at Staples and throughout the community. It’s not hard to see why.

SLOBs’ CPR training.

=======================================================

Speaking of Staples: Jo Shields was impressed to find this message chalked on the high school sidewalk the other day, next to the main entrance:

(Photo/Jo Shields)

It says “Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of bravery.”

Similar messages could be seen on sidewalks all around the school. They’re part of the Guidance Department’s ongoing efforts to raise awareness of the importance of mental health.

======================================================

MoCA Westport’s first-ever Open Mic last night sounds great!

Sixteen performers — as young as 14, and as old as 87 — shared poems and music with the community. Westport poet laureate Jessica McEntee also participated. Performers ranged in age from young as 14 to as old as 87.

Click here for the full program.

Vivian Shamie performs at last night’s “MoCA Some Noise” open mic event. (Photo/Cynthia Dempster)

=======================================================

Today’s “Westport … Naturally” photo comes courtesy of Susan Leone. It was taken from the Riverwalk, behind the Library.

Once again, she — and her friend — remind us how fortunate we are to live here.

(Photo/Susan Leone)

======================================================

And finally … on this day in 1879,  Thomas Edison applied for a patent for his incandescent light bulb.

You Are Not Alone: Students Raise Awareness Of Mental Health

For years, discussion of mental health has been taboo. People have suffered in silence, not wanting to be judged by family, friends or colleagues.

Finally, mental health has become a mainstream topic. One of the most important places to talk about it is school.

To prepare for Mental Health Awareness Month in May, the Staples High School Climate Committee and Teen Awareness Group (TAG) are launching a community-wide campaign. The goal is to raise awareness, and let people know they are not alone.

TAG — a youth-led non-profit and school club — is working on a documentary for their annual “Get Real Day” at Staples in May. The goal is to bring local stories of mental illness and substance abuse to students to encourage conversation, reduce stigma, and provide support and resources to students.

They need our help. TAG is looking for Westporters, Staples alumni, current students or teachers who are willing to share their stories through both text and video. Organizers say: “We want people to know this is a ‘we’ problem, not a ‘me’ problem.”

If you’d like to share your story, email Kelly Konstanty at kellyk12@me.com by April 15. Put “Mental Health Awareness Month” in the Subject line.

TAG — and the entire community — thank you.

Roundup: Real Estate, Brunch, Mental Health …

=====================================================

Westport’s real estate market continues to sizzle.

According to Brown Harris Stevens, though the 189 homes that closed in Westport in the 3rd quarter of 2021 represented a 29% decrease from the same period last year, that’s still the 2nd highest number of closings for the quarter in 20 years.

The average house closing price rose 5o $1.86 million, a 9% year-over-year increase and the highest for any quarter in Westport in the past decade.

Homes on average sold for 101.4% of the list price — the 2nd straight quarter it’s been over 100%.

Closed houses in the 3rd quarter spent an average of 58 days on the market — a record low. (Hat tip: Roe Colletti)

This house at 5 Hedley Farms Road in the Greens Farms neighborhood is on the market at $12.6 million.

======================================================

There’s something new on the menu at La Plage: brunch.

The highly touted restaurant at the Inn at Longshore starts serving this Saturday and Sunday (11:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m.).

There’s a raw bar and a la carte menu. The $25 prix fixe brunch includes a bloody mary or mimosa. The kiddy brunch menu is $15 — without, of course, the alcohol.

=======================================================

Dogs and music are the themes of the Remarkable Theater’s next 2 movies.

The Imperial Avenue drive-in screens “Togo” tomorrow (Saturday, October 9, 6:45 p.m.). Appropriately, it’s the day before the Westport Weston Chamber of Commerce Dog Festival. Canines are welcome.

“The Last Waltz” — the great film about the great band — will be shown Tuesday (October 12, 6:30 p.m.).

Click here for tickets and more information.

====================================================

Westport’s 25th annual Mental Health Breakfast is set for October 26 (8 a.m., Westport Library). Residents can attend in person, and join virtually.

The event will address the intersection of youth mental health and substance abuse. Dr. Aaron Wiener will offer insights about youth drug trends and the potential impact of recent marijuana legalization, followed by audience questions and further opportunities for discussion and networking among providers.

Click here to register in person. Click here for the virtual program.

Dr. Aaron Weiner

=======================================================

The town has just received a big gift. Dorsky Gallery Curatorial Programs in New York donated 23 prints, created in the 1970s by noted artist Richard Hunt (b. 1936) to the Westport Public Art Collections.

The gift helps realize the Westport Arts Advisory Committeee’s initiative to “contemporize and diversify the public art collection,” says town arts curatoro Kathie Bennewitz.

The works will be featured in a 2022 exhibition at MoCA, showcasing WestPAC’s recent accessions and rich holdings.

1st Selectman Jim Marpe and town arts curator Kathie Bennewitz flank Noah Dorsky,. They admire the Dorsky Gallery’s gift of 23 prints.

=======================================================

There’s no end to the wonders of “Westport … Naturally.”

Yesterday it was termites. Today we feature a mushroom. Matt Murray spotted this beauty in the small park on Compo Beach Road by Gray’s Creek — not far from the graves of men who died at the Battle of Compo Hill.

(Photo/Matt Murray)

=======================================================

And finally … “The Last Waltz” — next Tuesday’s Remarkable Theater feature (see above) — includes some remarkable performances. None is as memorable as this closing number:

 

Melissa Bernstein Offers Hope For Anguish, Depression

In the toy industry, Melissa Bernstein is a rock star.

The world knows her as co-founder and chief creative officer — with her co-founder husband and fellow native Westporter — of Melissa & Doug. The $500 million company is legendary for its toys that encourage interactive, hands-on play, and spark the imagination of children in a way screens and high-tech never can.

Yet for most of her life, Melissa Bernstein did not even know herself.

She and Doug built the business from scratch. It was their idea, their execution, their 32 years of hard — yet very fulfilling — work.

Melissa Bernstein, with some of her creations.

They married in 1992. They have 6 accomplished children, ranging in age from 27 to 13. They built a beautiful home.

Yet all along — for as long as she can recall — Melissa lived with existential anguish and depression. It made her who she is.

And at times, it made her want to end her life.

Existential anguish and depression is not a DSM diagnosis. But her torment — a crisis of doubt and meaning — was frighteningly real. It was “the darkest nihilism. Life seemed absurd and futile.”

Her mother remembers Melissa screaming every day, for the first year of her life. It was not colic; these were terrifying shrieks. “I had no words or creative solutions to what I was feeling,” Melissa says.

Melissa and Doug Bernstein.

Melissa grew up with that pain. But she was creative too. She wrote verses, and was a musician. But in college, realizing she would never play professionally, she quit music cold turkey.

She sought solace in academic performance. Looking back, she says, that turn “took me out of my heart, and into my head.” She felt “completely and utterly worthless.”

It was a coping mechanism involving denial, resistance, avoidance and dissonance, Melissa realizes now.

She created a “perfect, fictitious world” in her head. She lived in that “blissful place, filled with imaginary friends,” for at least a decade.

To the outside world, Melissa projected a façade of perfection. She worked, volunteered with the Levitt Pavilion, Music Theater of Connecticut and July 4th fireworks. She ferried her children to every sport and activity. The biggest criticism of her as a parent, she says, was that she seemed “emotionless.”

Doug and Melissa Bernstein, with their 6 children.

“Part of my validation was being a martyr,” she says. “I had to put one foot in front of the other. I had to think of my kids before me.”

Doug did not have an inkling of what Melissa was going through. But neither did she.

“I couldn’t let this demon come up,” she notes. “If I did, it would have taken me down.”

Five years ago, Melissa began to “connect the dots in a profound way.” She was exhausted. “I wanted to stop racing. It’s hard to resist everything you feel and are,” she says.

She listened to podcasts like “The Good Life Project.” She read Viktor Frankl’s “Man’s Search for Meaning.” She learned that “as humans, our number one motive is a search for meaning.”

Melissa says, “My heart stopped. With profound alacrity, I knew what I was afflicted with.”

The more she learned, the more she realized that highly creative people — Beethoven, Mozart, Tolstoy, Dostoevsky, Emily Dickinson, Hemingway — shared her anguish.

For the first time in her life, Melissa did not feel alone.

Understanding her hypersensitivity to “both the beauty of the world, and unbearable pain,” she cried for 3 days.

She had awakened a window into her soul. She came to terms that her creative blessing was also a curse.

Melissa Bernstein

All those verses she’d written; all the toys she’d developed — they were outward signs of who Melissa Bernstein is. Now, she knew, she had to accept internally who she is too.

She could not do it alone. With the help of therapist Loredana Trandu, she has learned to make sense of her life.

“My journey with her was arduous. It was the lowest I ever felt,” Melissa says. “But she was there every step of the way. She’d been to that spot. I wasn’t scared.”

Now, Melissa wants to help others.

First, she shared her story on Jonathan Fields’ “Good Life” project. Hundreds of listeners responded. Their words were soulful and heart-wrenching. One told Melissa, “you put words to what was ineffable and hidden.”

She emailed or called every one. She followed up in depth with nearly 100.

Now, she and Doug have developed LifeLines. An ecosystem — books, videos, podcasts, community — its goal is to “help frame those soul-searching questions that allow you to explore your authentic self and discover what makes you tick.”

Melissa Bernstein reads her “LifeLines” book.

LifeLines is based on 3 premises:

  • You are not alone
  • We all have the capacity to channel darkness into light
  • We will not find true fulfillment and peace until we look inward and accept ourselves.

Completely free — funded by the Bernsteins — it’s about to roll out nationally. Major media like the Washington Post, USA Today, People, Elle magazine and “Good Day New York” are covering LifeLines this week and next.

Westporter David Pogue airs a segment on “CBS Sunday Morning” this weekend (March 14).

David Pogue tapes a segment with Melissa Bernstein, in her Westport home.

LifeLines has become Melissa’s life. She has recorded nearly 3 dozen podcasts, and oversees every aspect of the project. Yet she still takes time each day to speak to individual men and women — people just like her, who feel the same overpowering existential anguish and depression.

Being on the national stage — and speaking to strangers — is important. But Melissa is our neighbor. Sometimes the hardest part of baring our souls is doing it to those who know us well.

The other day at a Staples basketball game, a woman looked away when they met. Then she said, “I’m so sorry.”

Melissa felt badly that the woman felt so uncomfortable.

“We need a huge education program,” she says. “We know what to say, and not say, when someone dies. Now we need a new national conversation on how to talk about mental health.”

It’s taken Melissa Bernstein her entire life to discover herself, and open that internal dialogue. Now, with LifeLines, she’s opening up to the world.

The chief creative officer of one of the world’s leading toy companies is playing for keeps.

(PS: On Thursday, March 18 at 7 p.m., the Westport Library hosts a conversation with Melissa — and me — about her journey. Click here to register.)

 

Human Services: Don’t Neglect Mental Health!

This afternoon — as Westport schools mark 6 weeks since closing — town officials reminded residents that despite physical isolation, we all need social connections. They’re key to maintaining mental and physical health.

Department of Human Services director Elaine Daignault says:

When we must stay at home, it can be challenging to maintain connections, and manage new or existing mental health matters. Many of us are learning to live with uncertainty, which requires a degree of patience with ourselves and others.

Identifying and discussing your own anxieties and fears is one way to manage the stress that we all feel. You may also choose to create a daily routine that includes exercise, a hobby and time for yourself.

Sitting with this discomfort is part of the process. So is finding activities to engage your mind and body to relieve yourself from the worry. For those experiencing significant anxiety and depression, please acknowledge that you need help and seek additional support. Start with your primary care provider and/or your mental health provider. Most are offering tele-health visits from the comfort of your own homes.

Many therapists are now online.

If you’re having trouble getting started, or require a personal conversation to determine which options are best for you, Department of Human Services staff are available by phone and/or email Mondays through Fridays. 830 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. (203-341-1050 or Humansrv@westportct.gov).

We are happy to speak with you, and will provide resources to support you and your families now and in the future.

We also recognize that this can be a stressful time for families. Westport Together was launched in late 2019 as an alliance between the town, Westport Public Schools, PTA and many local non-profits to strengthen the health and well-being of youth and families.

While in-person events have been canceled, we continue to provide relevant and dynamic content on our Westport Together Facebook page. Click here to see. Stay tuned for more details on excellent panel discussions ahead.

Westport Psychiatrist: Physical, Mental Health More Important Than Ever

Dr. Rishon Stember is a Westport psychiatrist. He writes:

These days, physical and mental health are more important than ever.

As a psychiatrist I am receiving many calls from patients experiencing panic attacks and insomnia.  Unfortunately, this is not unusual.

Dr. Rishon Stember

It is very important for people experiencing elevated anxiety to know that they are not alone. This is the time to reach out for help. Please call or email your physician or mental health professional for guidance at this time. Telemedicine is now the norm.

In my own practice, sessions are by phone and medications are being filled electronically.

Stay vigilant about staying home if possible. Wash hands often. Keep social distance. Get plenty of sleep. Be kind to yourself emotionally.

Telephone friends and family. Don’t hesitate to acknowledge the reality of the situation, but know that it is temporary.

Mindfulness is a a great tool to use. Don’t think about the past or the future; just concentrate on being in the present. Try to take time, and appreciate every small activity you do. Take in sights, sounds, flavors and aromas.

Often, talking to a mental health professional and/or medication can be useful.  As with a headache, meds can be helpful until the headache is gone.

We will get through this. Stay strong, healthy and positive.

Alex Drexler couldn’t sleep. He took his dog on a 5-mile walk. The sunrise helped.

Substance Misuse, Mental Health Survey Now Live

Substance misuse and mental health are national issues.

Local ones, too.

But how prevalent are they? And if we don’t know the answers, how can anyone help?

Today, the Westport Prevention Coalition launches an online survey. It was created by the Human Services Department, in partnership with the Westport Prevention Coalition and Positive Directions.

The anonymous survey will “provide helpful information as the Coalition embarks on prevention and resource development efforts addressing substance misuse, mental health services and overall wellness across the lifespan,” says Human Services director Elaine Daignault.

The goal is to gain input from a cross-section of age groups. It will
complement the youth and parent surveys administered through Positive Directions bi-annually in partnership with Westport Public Schools.

Click here for the survey. For more information, or to obtain a paper copy, call 203-341-1050.