Tag Archives: Civility

Intimidation Tactic Appalls Residents

Monday’s Board of Education meeting was heated. The Staples High School library’s banned books display was one reason. Another was the board’s vote against adding that issue to their already long agenda.

But residents were allowed to speak during the public session, before the first agenda item. Nine did.

Midway through the discussion, a man in a beige coat moved quickly toward a teenage girl. Lilly Weisz was taking photos for Inklings, the school newspaper.

He stood menacingly over her. “He was really, really intimidating,” one observer said.

Two Westport Public Schools staff members — waiting for a later agenda item — got up, to stand nearby.

Superintendent of Schools Thomas Scarice saw what was happening. He left his seat, and stood next to the student for several minutes. “He wanted to make sure she was safe,” a meeting attendee said.

Superintendent of Schools Thomas Scarice stands between an Inklings reporter and a man who had moved intimidatingly toward her. (Contributed photo)

One person at the meeting was so worried, he called 911.

Eventually, the man left.

Lilly says, “As a journalist, we’re trained to expect anything from anyone. There was a lot of tension at the meeting, and there are a feelings about journalists all around the nation.”

She says the man approached her, and asked why she was taking pictures. She explained she was with the school paper. “I’m here to gather as much information as I can, and write an unbiased article.”

She felt “aggression toward me.” However, Lilly says, after other people talked to him, he apologized.

“I don’t think he represents his entire side,” she notes. “People from both sides thanked me afterward for reporting on the issue. Overall, I felt supported by the community. I think people wanted me to succeed.”

Lilly’s story will appear in the next print edition of Inklings.

 

The paper’s co-advisor Mary Elizabeth Fulco says, “I am extremely proud of my Inklings reporter, Lilly Weisz, for her demonstrated maturity, professionalism and courage.”

Several residents contacted “06880” yesterday, saying they had never seen behavior like that. One called it “appalling, and abhorrent.”

We all know that over the past few years, social norms, civility and public discourse have deteriorated.

Up to now, behavior like that has happened in other places.

On Monday night, it was in full display at an open town meeting.

Right here in our town.

[OPINION] That Kid You Yelled At Knows Your Name

An alert — and perceptive — “06880” reader writes:

Westport has some absolute summer jewels. Camp Mahackeno, Longshore Sailing School, Parks and Recs programs, Earthplace…

These organizations are run by professionals. But they are staffed each summer by local kids.

Moms and dads: Were your ears burning last night? Those kids were talking about some of you.

I heard them. They were talking about you at my house.

You want your kids to have a great summer. You don’t have to yell at teenagers working hard at their summer job.

After one full day of summer, there are already stories of Westport parents behaving badly. My kid can’t get into a class because it’s full? I can’t get a refund for a program that started today and I just decided I don’t want? What do you mean, there are no more boats?

And on and on and on. These calls are often followed by an expletive, then a dial tone.

Westport is a small town. It’s a community. When you call one of these summer institutions to register for or reserve something, or inquire or cancel, the kids know who you are.

And when you verbally abuse them, they talk about it. With their friends, and their own parents.

I know 2020 was rough. Everyone is excited about 2021; there’s plenty of pent- up energy.

But it was also a rough year for that high school kid on the other end of the phone. So before you call her a “bitch” for not refunding your money for a program with a waiting list that already started, or scream that his boss will hear that he didn’t give you a kayak: Remember, we’re all in this together.

And that those kids mentioned you last night. By name.

Jaime Bairaktaris: “I Saw Hatred Today”

Jaime Bairaktaris is a multi-talented, community-minded Westporter. On Monday the 2016 Staples High School graduate, current Sacred Heart University student and 2020 Connecticut Paraeducator of the Year witnessed something disturbing downtown. He writes: 

I’ve heard about hatred in our community. I’ve heard stories from friends, neighbors, social media and news sources. But I had not seen it myself.

This week, I think I saw it. It was ugly and deliberate, in the form of 3 middle school boys with their opinion to display, or partially formed frontal lobes to blame, or a sense of common respect to try to gain.

But there it was, plain as day.

I paused while tutoring another middle schooler. We watched the boys pull up a sign for a national political candidate from Jesup Green. They broke it into pieces, threw it in a trash bin, then took turns spitting on it before walking away, screaming to each other.

Spitting on it!

We were confused. So were the many other kids and adults sharing Jesup Green and Riverwalk tables. My student and I talked about respect, hatred, and why — regardless of opinion — we respect all things, and all people.

A nice day, marred.

We talked about better ways to share our own opinions, and how everyone’s opinion matters in one way or another.

Then we talked about how we never spit. Not during a pandemic, not on a sign, not at another person. Not ever.

As we talked, a group of middle school girls retrieved the sign from the trash. They placed it back on the lawn.

My student and I talked about how there are helpers everywhere. We talked about why we need to restore the good that is sometimes taken from a community, and how sometimes it is taken by people who may not realize they’re doing it — or may not care.

I wish I could have thanked those girls. Not just for putting back the sign, but for caring. For teaching us a positive lesson. And for reminding us that the majority of kids who hang out downtown do care.

But then the boys returned. They ripped the sign from the ground again, threw it onto Jesup Road, and took turns jumping on it. Then they flung it onto the middle of Jesup Green, before finally leaving.

Those boys did not care.

I wish I could have said something to my student, to everyone around us, to the girls who tried to help — something that could have made the situation better.

But I was at a loss. So I went back to our social studies. The hum of conversation and COVID-era working returned to the green.

I reported the incident to the police, so it’s on record. But I don’t know who those 3 boys are. I only know they don’t care. I don’t know their names, their families, their hobbies, their strengths, who they’ve helped in their lives, or who looks up to them.

I don’t know any good things about them. I only know that they destroyed a sign on Jesup Green.

Is this bigotry? Impulsivity? Stress? Lack of education? Too much media? Am I a snowflake? Or a Karen? Do I care too much? Did I not care enough to stop them? Is this a non-issue? Or is this a real probme.

This is not a case of “kids being kids.” The majority of those I see on their skateboards, scooters or bikes, in the deli or on the green, are energetic, loud, and — most importantly — respectful.

They’re doing what they should be doing: having fun, while learning how to make their own choices.

These boys made their choices. They chose hatred.

So I can’t help but wonder: How do we fix this?