It’s 5 a.m. Have You Saved Your Fireworks Spot Yet?

This story is posted at 5 a.m. Wednesday, July 2.

Which means that in about 10 minutes — if they haven’t already — people will descend on Compo Beach.

They’ll haul beach chairs, blankets, tables, tents, coolers — everything including, perhaps, a kitchen sink or two — and spread them across vast swaths of the sand.

Because hey, that’s what Westporters do to reserve a spot for the 4th 2nd of July fireworks. They start a mere 16 hours from now.

6:40 a.m., 2024. (Photo/Susie Kowalsky)

It’s the human version of dogs peeing to mark territory.

When the practice began more than a decade ago, many residents were aghast. Staking out a spot, then leaving for 10 or 12 hours — making the beach look for most of the day as if aliens had abducted every human — was not something we did.

If you wanted a picnic before the fireworks, you got there relatively early.

And you stayed.

Gradually — actually, fairly rapidly — that social norm was shattered.

Much the same way we now think nothing of wearing flip flops to Broadway — or deporting people who have been here for decades to foreign countries without a hint of due process — the arms race of claiming land on the sand has become just another part of life.

Sure, a few people will send photos to “06880” of egregious beach-taking — 20 to 30 chairs, all occupied by ghosts.

But those horses left the Compo barn long ago. There is nothing you, I, or the Parks & Recreation Department can do.

2022 (Photo/Dan Aron)

In fact, there is an upside to all this. Years ago, cars began lining up around 4 p.m., when the beach opened to fireworks ticket holders. Stretching as far back as Greens Farms Road were families waiting to enter, find a spot, lug their gear and start partying.

Things are much calmer now. There is no 4 p.m. rush — just a leisurely, steady flow of folks moseying in, over the next couple of hours.

Still — like airport gate agents trying to make sure that passengers in boarding group 9 don’t try to sneak into group 3 — we can try to impose a bit of order to the early-morning process. So here are a few tips/hints/thoughts.

Some people will think they apply to everyone else, but not to them.

Some will read — then promptly (even proudly) ignore them.

Yet if even a few people heed them, we’ll bring a bit of civility to what should be Westport’s biggest, best — and friendliest — party of the year.

Take only what you need. This is not a Golden Corral all-you-can-eat buffet. The amount of “food” (sand) is limited. Leave some for others. To put it another way: If your reserved section can — like a crop circle — be seen from the sky, it’s too big.

Your tent may block my view. Around 4 p.m., the lifeguards will probably make an announcement that all tents must be taken down, or moved back toward the boardwalk, parking lot and Soundview Drive.

2023 (Photo/Matt Murray)

You may not reserve the picnic tables at South Beach. The signs on each table are clear. If you want one, send someone to sit there all day. Sorry, but there is a limited number of tables. You might think it’s okay to reserve a pool chair by at your favorite resort. But reserving a picnic table here is still a no-no.

Use what you take. If you realize you’re hogging more than your share, draw those chairs closer.

And then have fun. Talk to the folks next to you, even if you think they infringe on “your” party. Share your chips, your wine, your kids.

Finally, when it’s over: Take all your s— home. 

If you lugged a beach table there at 5 a.m., lug it back to your car at 10 p.m. Parks & Rec is not your clean-up crew. You’d be amazed at how much gets left — much of it not inadvertently — behind.

Happy 4th 2nd of July! If you’ve read this far, thank you.

But you really should head to the beach right now. Everyone else is already there, stealing your spot.

Where is everyone? …

… and the payoff. (Photos/Dan Woog)