A Modest Proposal

As reported yesterday, neighbors don’t want 11 homes built on the site of the former Daybreak property off Main Street and Weston Road, near Merritt Parkway Exit 42. They cite traffic and environmental concerns.

And Westporters don’t want a medical marijuana dispensary on the Post Road either. Two proposed locations are too close to elementary schools.

The solution is obvious, and perfect: Instead of 11 homes on Daybreak, put a dispensary there.

Problem solved!

51 responses to “A Modest Proposal

  1. Edward Brennan

    Wonderful, fabulous idea! The site is already approved for commercial use, and selling grass is still selling grass (and trees and shrubs…) Still an F-rated intersection, but now the incremental traffic will stoned, mellow drivers, not the typical get out of my way – I’m so important.

    • Better yet, combine the dispensary with the Tesla service shop, and make them both age-restricted, just for mellow, stoned seniors in need of a tune up!

  2. Tom Feeley Sr

    Where can we purchase patches with that beautiful St Patrick’s Day logo⁉️😜🇺🇸🍀

  3. Michelle Benner

    Haha, perfect! And we can put the other dispensary down by the beach in the old positano building! Boom!

  4. Arline Gertzoff

    April Fool’s is two week’s away

  5. Great solution. That is great location for the drug dispensary away from post road

  6. Mary Ruggiero

    If used to build a dispensary, I predict multitudinous accidents by patrons trying to negotiate that wonderful intersection!

  7. Great idea Dan

    Sent from my iPhone


  8. Mary Ann Neilson

    Note: A dispensary at 500 Main Street? Hell no. It is no longer commercial.
    A dispensary can’t go into or near a residential zone. Just why is it that folks feel nothing about dumping on this neighborhood? Enough already. If breaking rules to plop a dispensary in a residential neighborhood is okay … put it on Greens Farms Road or at the top of Minuteman Hill.

    • Edward Brennan

      If you had chosen to put your time and energy into getting that horrible intersection fixed, instead of blocking a much needed project, you might have actually achieved something positive. As things now stand the intersection is still F-rated and will continue to be so. Your actions are clearly more NIMBY in nature than were driven by your incremental traffic concerns, which were greatly overstated, as well as inconsistent with the traffic studies, by your choice of phrases “dump on this neighborhood.”

      • Mary Ann Neilson

        Ed, Westport voted NOT to fix the intersection years ago. I personally did not concern myself with traffic. But rather breaking the Town Plan of Development regs by putting cluster housing without the ability to hook up to town sewage, as required would have opened the floodgates of ‘special permits’ all over Westport.

  9. Rozanne Gates

    Someday we will all grow up and become Canada (in my wildest dreams).

    • Ellen Wentworth

      Eh! Good idea!

    • Nancy Hunter

      Y’all wouldn’t like it. Too quiet, no drama, sensible rules… Then again, you could always read your hometown blog, or watch cable news for fun.

  10. Stacy Prince

    Ha!!! Love the lateral thinking.

  11. Mary Ann Neilson

    Enough already with cheery, uncaring ideas on how to dump on the exit 42 neighborhood. First, 500 Main is no longer ‘commercial’. Second, a dispensary cannot be placed in a residential neighborhood or a certain amount of feet from residences.
    If folks think it is just dandy to break all zoning regs and plop a dispensary in any zoned residential area … How about Greens Farms Road or Minuteman Hill? Or better yet next to your house.

  12. Michael Calise

    18- xxxxxx
    18-1 must be located at 6 way intersection without traffic lights
    18-2 must be within 500 feet of a limited access highway
    18-3 direct access to a state of Connecticut roadway required
    18-3.1 site shall be limited to a single entrance/exit driveway
    18-3.2 traffic pattern shall be counterclockwise through underground garage
    18-3.3 site lighting limited to driveway
    18-4 site must be a minimum of two acres
    18-5 limited to one single story building
    18-5.1 maximum building height of 16 feet
    18-5.2 maximum building footprint of 2,500 sq. ft.
    18-5.3 No display windows allowed
    18-6 limited to underground parking including emergency vehicles
    18-7 entire site must be landscaped in grass including building roof
    18-8 no outdoor benches or furniture allowed
    18-8 no signage allowed

  13. Richard Fogel

    the people near the dispensary will need medical marijuana to deal with the stress of the traffic

  14. Ann Marie Flynn

    That location would definitely cut down on foot traffic…to and fro.

  15. Eric William Buchroeder SHS '70

    What is there about “medical marijuana” that does not allow it to be “dispensed” as any other prescription medicine? I’m not saying that at some point it shouldn’t become over the counter or even “mainstream” as alcohol and aspirin have become but why are we even worrying about setting up a separate single use channel of distribution much less whether it should be located on a busy thoroughfare in a residential area? The “Daybreak Debacle” is its own fiasco but trace both issues down to their individual root causes and I believe that the profit motive is what they both have in common. Assuming this is so, Westporters have to look at the trade-offs because profit is always income for some at the expense of others. Private problems do not always have to be solved by public sacrifice and public resources should not be used to enrich the few at the expense of many.

  16. Before more people get bent out of shape by Dan’s modest proposal…look up Jonathan Swift’s version. It’s a satire.

    • Eric William Buchroeder SHS '70

      I recognized the satire but was caught up in the discussion. I’m pretty sure that in the end the right decisions will be made.

  17. Brilliant! Although I tend to believe that those who opposed the dispensaries at those locations oppose them being anywhere in Westport.

  18. Concerned Parent

    So Coleytown Elementary School and the young children that attend don’t matter?

    • Usually I delete comments from readers who don’t use full names (and offer them the chance to repost). However, I’m leaving this up, just because it so effectively satirizes my own satiric post.

      “Concerned Parent” — you were kidding, right? Please say you knew I was joking. Please!

      • Concerned Parent

        I was absolutely crossing my fingers that you were posting this for a chuckle. However, as one post already poignantly remarked, there is truth in every joke.

        As a general question, I’m curious as to how many people who support the idea of a medical marijuana dispensary in town are parents of young children, or are children of the 60s who are giddy with the thought that they can pull out their grateful dead T-shirts once again, and are excited about the prospect of being able to pick up a bag of weed as easily as a carton of milk at the corner market?

        If the true purpose of a medical dispensary is for medical use, then it should be dispensed at hospital pharmacy or better yet at a dispensary right on location of the growing farm.

        Or how about, your next suggestion Dan, convert 500 Main St. to a growing farm?

        A Loyal Reader

  19. How about putting it near Shake Shack – for obvious (munchies) reasons?

  20. Mike McGovern

    Brilliant call out to “A Modest Proposal” on St. Patrick’s Day!☘️

  21. Well done Dan. Swift’s original proposal addressed conditions in Ireland; ostensibly.

  22. Cathy Barnett

    Yesterday’s post about medical marijuana dispensary suggested it be dumped on Norwalk or some other nearby city.
    How about Norwalk Hospital?

  23. Brilliant!


  24. Sue Brenner7



  25. Dan, if you’re serious, this is not a good idea either in my opinion. I’m glad the 11 homes aren’t being built and don’t want to see a dope dispensary in the neighborhood either. I agree with Mr. Buchroeder’s comment above about normal distribution channels if in fact the drug is serving a medical need.

    I’d like to see another nursery on the site, although I assume that wouldn’t be economical since Daybreak apparently couldn’t make it. Nosebleed land values are a blessing when we’re trying to sell or re-finance our homes, but a curse the rest of the time. The Daybreak site may have to sit vacant now like so many other locations high costs have made uneconomical.

  26. Nice nod to Jonathan Swift. And on St. Patrick’s Day to boot!

  27. Dermot Meuchner

    I totally agree Dan. We have liquor stores on every street but no one screams about that because… it’s legal when it was once illegal.

  28. Stephanie Bass

    Works for me

  29. Bart Shuldman

    Dan-truly sad that over 55 housing was turned down. This location was close to town and the highway. When will Westport do something for our seniors??

    During the November election we heard a lot from Melissa Kane about the need for senior housing. She spoke a lot of building housing close to town.

    This seemed like that type of location, close to town so I am asking if Melissa stood up to defend the project?

  30. Nancy Hunter

    Heck, better to be at a local pub enjoying a pint instead! (here in St. John’s the doors opened at 7:30am!) Slainte mhath!

  31. This is a funny post – good one Dan. I do hope a revised senior plan is soon presented for the property, which is an appropriate low intensity use,
    Regarding the MM issue, it is big business. The P&Z allotted two locations with the idea of price competition between them. Unfortunately, the last thing an operator would want is a discreet location to serve Westport patients who need it. Rether, they seek the largest and most prominent locations they can get. A small fraction of the square footage is for the “MM”and the rest of it is for other wellness uses that can be advertised with larger signs that are code for marijuana. Eventually recreational marijuana will be legal in CT as it is elsewhere, and location is everything for a business. That is the reason companies are bidding for the limited permitted medical marijuana locations throughout the state.
    I urge the P&Z to reject the large locations and support First Selectman Jim Marpe’s sensible and balanced approach.

  32. Dan,
    “..You.. light up my life…”
    ….every morning, Thank’s

  33. Melody James

    Why not something green, where green thrived for so many years?

  34. Don L. Bergmann

    All I would add is for people to be accurate and to characterized their personal expectations as reflecting conjecture. One proposed dispensary includes a separate “wellness function”, the second does not. CT law mandates the approach the Town confronts, i.e. a separate, licensed dispensary that will serve those having a doctor’s prescription to access this medicine. My conjecture is that the facility or facilities will generate minimal to no controversy unless protesters express their concerns before we all can see the impact of the facility. My conjecture is also that the impact of the facility will be predominantly, if not totally, simply a source for people in ill health to obtain relief from some of the symptoms of their illness.
    Don Bergmann

  35. Isabelle Breen, LCSW

    I’m startled to see that in an intelligent community like Westport, how much misinformation there is regarding this topic. Perhaps some insight into how it is used would help. It’s important to understand the goal is not to get high, but to get symptom relief. Most persons with serious life impairing symptoms DON’T want to be high. They want increased functionality. Breeders work toward this end. This is not about recreational use. At all.
    Because of the multiple strains needed for various types of relief, a large selection is needed. CVS would not be able to stock enough strains. New patients need education and assistance. This requires time and space, something the pharmacist cannot do on a one to one basis.
    I’ve posted an excerpt below from:
    I hope it’s found useful.
    “Before you begin taking medical marijuana, it helps to know a little about it. A marijuana doctor will make recommendations for your specific situation, but you will still have some latitude to decide what works best for you. A better understanding of the chemicals you are dealing with will make medical marijuana less intimidating for you.

    There are three main varieties of cannabis plants: indica, ruderalis and sativa. Most of the cannabis grown today is a hybrid of cannabis indica and cannabis sativa. In addition, the plant breeders who are developing the seeds create thousands of variations.

    While all medical marijuana provides similar benefits, the specific effects of sativa and indica are somewhat different from each other.

    Indica benefits include:

    Reduced nausea
    Inflammation reduction
    Relaxed muscles
    Cloudy thinking
    Sativa benefits include:

    Increased energy
    Increased appetite
    Mood elevation
    Nausea relief
    Clarity and focus
    Hybrid forms of cannabis offer a cross-section of benefits. Most include reduced nausea and increased relaxation. When the dose is too high, however, some of the cannabis benefits turn into negatives, including increased anxiety, insomnia or paranoia.

    Various cannabis hybrids are bred to isolate different cannabinoids for their specific affects. THC was the first compound discovered in cannabis, and it has the most psychoactive affects. Other compounds have been isolated and determined to provide therapeutic benefits without the high.

    For medicinal marijuana, it is important that the various effects of cannabis can be separated. Here are some of the compounds found in marijuana and their effects:

    CBD – Probably the most important compound in marijuana for medical purposes, CBD relieves nausea and anxiety, and it reduces inflammation and frequency and severity of convulsions.
    CBC – This one causes a mild sedative affect and combines with THC to relieve pain.
    THCV – One of the newer discoveries, this compound could help with metabolic disorders and type 2 diabetes.
    CBN – This compound is helpful in reducing pressure in the eyes associated with glaucoma and the frequency of seizures. It also delivers a mild high.
    CBG – With antimicrobial properties and a sedative effect, this compound also lowers pressure in the eyes from glaucoma.
    Breeders try to adjust their hybrids to balance the amount of certain compounds in each type of cannabis. By making adjustments, they can create medical marijuana that focuses on a particular type of therapy. The goal, of course, is to breed in the best benefits while breeding out the negative side effects.”

  36. right on Dan the NY thugs can come in on the merit snag a bag and be gone before anyone’s the wiser