The woman caring for an affluent family’s children had just had a baby of her own. Health issues followed.
“We need you back now,” her employers said. “If you can’t come, we’ll find someone else.”
She faced a choice: Stay with her child, without pay. Or return to work, and pay someone to take care of her own baby.
That’s a common dilemma for low-wage women in America. It’s a situation people in places like Westport seldom think about.
Ir’s also one that’s rarely explored. Most studies of working women focus on professionals — how they balance office work and family life, for example.
Amanda Freeman knows all about the women who take care of children, serve our Starbucks and ship our Amazon packages.
Dr. Amanda Freeman
An assistant professor of sociology at the University of Hartford — and a Westport mother, with an undergraduate degree from Brown, an MFA from Columbia and a doctorate from Boston College — she has just published her first book.
“Getting Me Cheap: How Low-Wage Work Traps Women and Girls in Poverty” is the result of more than a decade of interviews with women balancing motherhood and difficult, low-paying jobs — without public aid.
And how that struggle perpetuates itself, generation after generation.
Freeman has written about the subject for years, in academic journals and publications like the Atlantic, Parenting and the Washington Post Magazine.
The book, she hopes, will draw more attention to an issue fundamental to not only the women trapped in the spiral of low-wage work, but the families that employ them and benefit them, in places like Westport.
Freeman and co-author Lisa Dodson — her grad school professor at Boston College — spoke to 200 women across the country. They worked in childcare and eldercare; at Stop & Shop and ShopRite, McDonald’s and Panera, and Amazon warehouses. Many were people of color; they’re over-represented in that sector.
The authors also interviewed women — including working mothers, stay-at-home moms, and those active in labor movements — in well-off neighborhoods.
That was for ‘so what?’ — the policy part, the ‘what can and should we do?’ part,” Freeman says.
“We wanted to see what responsibility moms like me have. I know mothers here who are very interested in these issues. They do think about what do you do with someone you employ in your home?”
Freeman says that, unlike women with means, low-wage workers do not often talk about “work/life balance.” They see their lives as “impossible demands.”
She explains: “Motherhood is the most important thing to them. They want to be present for their kids’ educations and lives. But they have to be employed — and they want to work.” Many are also taking courses to try to improve their job prospects.
They are well aware, however, that society may stigmatize, stereotype or misunderstand them.
Low prestige and childcare issues are just some of the problems faced by workers in low wage jobs.
While women in white-collar jobs may have difficulty balancing work and parenting, Freeman says, most employers understand at some level that they’re taking care of children (and/or their own parents).
Employers of low-wage workers tend not to be understanding at all. “There’s a constant churn of losing or changing jobs” because of those issues, Freeman says.
She notes too that 2/3 of the women she spoke to were single parents.
That leads to situations where, for example, a woman may have no choice but to bring her child to work. That’s often frowned upon — or not allowed.
When childcare fell through, a Shoprite baker tried to hide her 5-year-old. She was fired.
“Westport mothers tend to obsess over the health and safety of their kids,” says Freeman. “But these women have real, immediate health and safety concerns.’
“They’re proud of their kids,” Freeman says of the workers she interviewed. “But sometimes they won’t talk about them. They don’t want to be seen as mothers.”
When someone saw photos of one woman’s youngsters, she said they were her sister’s.
Another difference: Many companies offer paid maternity leave to salaried and professional workers. But it’s seldom provided to hourly workers.
“Ask about your company’s policy,” Freeman advises readers. “And be aware of what you can do to change it.”
Freeman and her husband — award-winning novelist, Emmy and Peabody-honored filmmaker, playwright and professor of screenwriting in the Graduate School at Columbia University Trey Ellis — have the luxury of arranging their teaching schedules so they don’t need a lot of childcare.
From left: Maia, Pamela and Amanda Freeman; Chet, Trey and Ava Ellis. Front: a friend.
But during COVID, she ordered much more from Amazon. She thought about those workers, some of whom she had already interviewed for her book. They were working harder and longer than ever.
“They were risking their lives for people like me,” Freeman says. “And for very little pay.”
On November 29 (7 p.m.), the Westport Library hosts Amanda Freeman. She’ll talk about the sometimes invisible, often overlooked women whose work makes our own lives here possible.
It should be an eye-opening and educational evening. Book your babysitter now. (For more information and to register, click here.)
(“06880” highlights many aspects of life in Westport — some visible, some under the surface. Please click here to support your hyper-local blog, and keep stories like these coming.)
