A Better Chance of Westport’s recent Dream Event was — as always — an inspiring evening.
Current and former scholars, family members, friends, and dozens of volunteers gathered to salute (and raise funds for) the program. ABC brings highly motivated, very smart and talented young men of color to Westport, to live together and attend Staples High School.
Among the Dream Event highlights: speeches by 2 sets of host parents. They’re the families that provide a “home away from home” for the scholars, on weekends during the school year.
It’s one of the often unheralded, sometimes overlooked, but crucial elements of ABC’s success. And the rewards for host families are as great for the host families, as for the scholars.
Today, a host parent describes her experience:
As a Westport mom, I know that being a parent involves lots of sacrifices.
Being the parent of a scholar in the A Better Chance program entails one of the biggest sacrifices I can imagine: sending your child away to a new school, to live in a house with unfamiliar peers, supervised by adults who aren’t relatives, while your child spends weekends with other (at first unfamiliar) families.
Even more challenging during the already demanding high school years, ABC parents courageously send their children to schools where they will be a minority. They entrust the enforcement of their child’s rules, boundaries and structure to the ABC resident directors, while giving up the daily routine of sharing meals, celebrating birthdays and Mother’s Day, even back seat banter with their child and their friends.
It has to be an excruciatingly hard decision.
ABC scholars also make tremendous sacrifices. They leave the comfort of their home, parents, friends and community.
ABC scholars are high achievers. They distinguished themselves at the top of their middle school classes, as students who would thrive in a rigorous high school. Through tests, interviews and a competitive selection process, they proved they could excel in the intense setting of Staples High School.
They made the difficult choice to pursue an opportunity here, leaving their homes to reside at Glendarcy House, and become part of our community.
A Better Chance scholars, at last weekend’s Dream Event.
While I can try to put myself in the ABC parents’ shoes, I imagine that a significant aspect of their decision is rooted in hope. They hope that the ABC community will embrace, protect and love their child.
It is a leap of faith. My family and I chose to ease the landing for these scholars and their parents, by being part of the ABC community.
For the past 4 years I have served as a host mom.
It is not as daunting as it sounds. It entails opening my home to a scholar for one weekend a month — about eight or nine weekends for the 2024-2025 school year — and inviting them to be part of our family.
Hanging with a host family …
The ABC scholars do not demand high-flying, extravagant experiences. They do not expect Broadway shows or front-row tickets to sporting events.
They’re often happy to just be in your home. What they truly appreciate is a welcoming space to unwind, share a meal with a family, and simply have some down time to recharge after their demanding week.
What the commitment offers host families is a truly enriching experience. It is a chance to learn about another teenager’s life, to experience Westport from the prospective of someone who is part resident, part newcomer.
Most importantly, it is an opportunity to open your home, and your heart, to a teenager looking for connection and understanding.
My children have fully embraced the host family experience. They include our scholar in their plans with friends, attend sports events together, discuss local issues, and trade perspectives on everything from March Madness to racism in high schools.
… and apple-picking …
This relationship has grown and developed over the years we’ve spent together. I know my kids will carry it with them in the future. They have benefited from knowing our scholar, who expanded their worldview, and offered them insight into the life of a peer with a different background — yet shared — experiences.
While being a host family may seem daunting, I assure you: Taking the leap of opening your home, heart and family to an ABC scholar is truly rewarding. I encourage my fellow Westport parents to consider being an ABC host family.
It is an enriching journey that offers an opportunity to learn and grow alongside a motivated, brave and fascinating teenager.
(Interested in learning about hosting a scholar for one weekend a month? Email abcwestporthost@gmail.com.)
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… and sharing a meal.
I encourage all families here in Westport to consider being an ABC Host Family. Our family has hosted two ABC Scholars (Savion Agard and Khaliq Sanda) for four years each. They became part of our family and were wonderful for our children to grow up with. Truly a great experience for everyone involved. Kudos to the A Better Chance organization for all they do for the scholars and our community.