It’s inevitable.
Moments after the sun rises tomorrow, someone will send me a photo like this:
Or this:
Or this:
I’m not sure who these people are, who think that reserving massive swaths of sand — or long picnic tables, with “You Cannot Reserve Tables” plastered prominently on them — is cool.
Well, actually I do. They’re all named Dick.
Don’t be like Dick. If you want a prime spot, pick a little bit of it. And have someone stay there all day. You can even hire some kid — yours, or someone else’s — to do it.
If the situation gets even more out of hand than it recently has — and it’s gotten grosser and greedier every year for the past few — we might want to consider the Shore & Country Club solution.
It’s private — but a prime viewing site for Norwalk’s fireworks (also July 3). Alert “06880” reader David Loffredo forwarded an email, from the club to members.
In late June, members who wanted a picnic table for fireworks day could click a link, to enter a drawing. They could request marina or beachhouse side, or covered or uncovered — but nothing was guaranteed.
Winners were selected randomly, and assigned a random table. Each table will be labeled with the member’s name.
One more, for good measure. (Photo/Amy Schneider)
What a great idea! We could auction off not only South Beach tables but prime spots of sand, from the cannons to the Soundview jetty.
It could even be a fundraiser for PAL (or Parks & Rec, for beach improvements): $5 to enter. If you don’t pay, you can’t play…
Better yet: a raffle! Tables and plots of sand could be clearly marked online; click on one, and bid. Just think how much that would raise 🙂
But here’s the best idea of all — and we can do it tomorrow.
Confiscate any unattended stuff, and charge Dick and his friends to get it back.
If it’s not claimed by, say, 6 p.m.: Sell it to whoever wants it.
Some of those tents, beach chairs, tables, coolers, portable grills — and the food in them — are pretty pricey. They could fund an entirely new bathroom!