Frontier is not the only phone company Westporters have issues with.
I should have known things would not go well when I called Sprint this morning to cancel my mother’s service. (She got an easier-to-use phone, not that it matters.)
I punched in her number. A voice chirped, “Sorry! I did not get that!” Which did not instill a lot of confidence in this particular telecommunications company.
After navigating the complex (and repetitive) phone tree, I reached an actual — though heavily accented — human being. When I said I wanted to cancel the service, I was disconnected. Instantly.
I called a 3rd time. This time, I started by saying I’d been cut off twice by a phone company. The representative apologized, and took my number to call back “in case it happens again.”
I asked how that could possibly happen. She agreed it shouldn’t, but said by way of explanation that all cancellations must be handled by a supervisor. Of course!
I listened to gruesome music for 6 minutes. Then — silence.
Luckily, she had my callback number. Two minutes later, my phone rang.
My mother has a Toyota. Perhaps you’ve heard of it?
To make sure I was legitimately calling to cancel an account — perhaps this is a wide-ranging scam — she asked for the make of my mother’s car. “Toyota,” I said.
“Can you spell that?” she asked.
NO, I COULD NOT, I replied (yes, using capital letters.) I told her it was like the best-selling car in the world. She let it go.
She assured me I would not be disconnected again. When I asked how long it would take for the supervisor to pick up, she said, “One to 3 minutes.” No problem! That’s a sprint!
Eight minutes later, the music stopped. I was — yet again — disconnected by a telecommunications company.
This time, there was no callback.
I went online. I did not have an account, so I filled out a form. The password I chose was “SprintSucks1.”
The next part of the form was “Set access level.” I was happy to, except:
- there was no way to do that, plus
- I had no idea what that meant.
I clicked “Help.” A popup message said, “Questions? Check out our support site with answers to your questions 24/7, or chat with us.”
Which I was happy to do. Except, there was no way to access the support site from the page I was on.
Once more — a mere 50 minutes after starting — I called again. I explained everything I had been through since I started calling THIS TELECOMMUNICATIONS COMPANY.
The representative pretended to be sympathetic. Miraculously, he did not need to contact a supervisor. He could handle this exceptionally difficult request — cancel the service — all by himself.
Which he did, after taking down my callback number just in case we were disconnected.
At last, it was done.
He had just one last question. Would I like an upgrade?
Why not? Yes! Of course!
I want Sprint to upgrade their !@#$%^&* customer service. Just kick it up a notch — from, say, “atrocious” to “abysmal” — and I’ll be ecstatic.
But I sure won’t call back to tell them that.