There are as many ways to get killed in Westport parking lots as there are banks on 1 block of the Post Road. Here are my nominations for the most congested, least well designed, and hardest to maneuver lots in town. Add your own favorites; just click “Comments.”
- Compo Shopping Center. The CVS parking lot is is the mother of all misery. It’s got it all: a cramped, confusing and poorly marked center entry and exit; 2-way traffic that feeds in from several different directions; a 1-way exit lane from the back with more blind spots than a cataract convention, and — the coup de grace — a crater by the Post Road entrance that auto body shop owners revere.
Note the two — two! — cars entering the CVS lot the wrong way.
- Compo Acres Shopping Center. Across the street from the CVS lot, this is miserable in its own unique way. There’s the 1-way lane in front of Tai Pan, with parking on both sides that attracts every driver with no ability to parallel park, and the entrance by Trader Joe’s that funnels 2 lanes of traffic into a congealed mess. The rear offers more hazards, including squeezing past Patriot Bank, then attempting to edge left, Sisyphean-like, onto South Compo past 2 lanes of always-stopped traffic, and a view-obliterating traffic island.
- The lot between the police station and Bank of America. You’d think a parking lot next to police headquarters would be a model of design and decorum. You’d think wrong. This section of the Jesup Avenue lot features parking spots dropped willy-nilly from the sky. They align with nothing — neither the police station exits nor those from the bank lots. There are no directional arrows and few stop signs. There is, however, much hand-gesturing by drivers, which helps not at all.
- Super Stop & Shop. I appreciate the extra-wide spaces next to each parking spot. Unfortunately, they accomplish nada. The lanes themselves are too narrow; the well-intentioned but space-eating trees force cars’ butts into traffic. There’s always a cruise ship-sized delivery truck parked by the supermarket entrance, cutting off access the way Jenny Sanford recently cut off Mark. And what’s with the no-left-turn-onto-the-Post-Road (wink wink) signs? WTF?
- Westfair Shopping Center. Directly across the street from Stop & Shop, this was outdated the moment it opened during the James K. Polk administration. Yeah, it’s nice to park in front of each store. But just try to get out. Smart Car owners feel like they’re driving stretch limos, as they maneuver between the angled cars and traffic zooming past the other side of the low concrete barrier. Don’t even try Plan B (circling behind the building to exit straight ahead). Like Charlie on the MTA, you’ll never return.
