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Love For Buggie

Buggie is a cute, lovely 5-year-old girl. Three days after Christmas, she was diagnosed with a rare, aggressive brain tumor.

She’s part of the Lundell/Hofstetter clan — 2 families that have been in Westport for decades, and done plenty for the town.

“Our entire family has been thrown into a crash course in pediatric oncology, psychology, neurology, and physical therapy,” says the website LoveforBuggie.

Buggie has been strong.  On her last day of radiation therapy she kissed the machine, held up 2 fingers, said “Peace out” — and blew kisses to the medical staff.

Love For BuggieBut on top of the devastating diagnosis, there are astronomical medical bills that will not be covered by the family’s premium insurance plan.

Family members and friends are uniting to raise funds, to achieve the best care and treatment for what they call “our beautiful and brave Bug.”

An open house is planned for this Saturday (May 11, 2 to 9 p.m.) at 15 Bridge Street, on the corner of Imperial Avenue.

Food will be catered by The Spread. Drinks are courtesy of Saugatuck Grain & Grape. The Eugene Ruffalo Trio will provide music.

All — including children! — are welcome. If you can’t be there but would like to contribute, checks (payable to “The Lundell Fund”) may be sent to Morgan Stanley, c/o The Saugatuck Group, 320 Post Road West, Westport CT 06880.

“Hello! I Must Be Going” Comes Home

Our new movie theater is still on the drawing board. But Westport has always produced movie-makers. And it’s still a great place to make movies.

Hello I must Be goingAll 3 elements come together on Sunday (March 24, 4 p.m., Town Hall), when Westport Cinema Initiative presents a screening of “Hello I Must Be Going.” Starring Blythe Danner, it was shot in Westport 2 years ago — and written and directed by Westport residents Todd Louiso and Sarah Koskoff.

The film — about a young divorcee moving back with her parents in suburban Connecticut, where an affair with a younger man rejuvenates her passion for life — received a Grand Jury Prize at last year’s Sundance Film Festival.

Westporters will recognize plenty of local scenes on screen — Compo, downtown, Viva’s to name just 3.

And plenty of local faces, in cameo roles. You can figure those out for yourselves.

Click below for a YouTube interview with director (and husband of Sarah Koskoff) Todd Louiso — or click here if your broswer does not link directly to it.:

Fulfilling Families

In 2003, Mark and Kim Mathias celebrated their 1st year in Westport. They loved the town, but missed the racial diversity of Los Angeles.

ABC logoFriends Ivan and Sharon Fong listened with interest. Both were on the board of A Better Chance of Westport. They described ABC’s mission — “giving motivated, outstanding minority youth the opportunity to achieve their dreams through education” — and suggested the Mathiases be a host family.

It was a great idea. A decade later, the family remains passionately involved.

(Host families provide a home away from the North Avenue residence every Sunday, and 1 weekend a month. ABC scholars participate in regular family activities –  meals, movies, even chores.)

“We were very impressed by the courage these 13- and 14-year-old young men showed, leaving the comfort of their families to strive for a better education and opportunity in Westport,” Kim says.

“I was particularly intrigued by the culture shock I was sure these youth would feel, and how they handled it. ABC offers impressive support, but not everyone can handle the academic rigor, the congregate living, the rules, the fish bowl, the standing out in a high pressure community.”

The current ABC scholars (from left): Adrian, Christopher, Ruben, Rhyse, Khaliq, Luis and Thomas.

The current ABC scholars (from left): Adrian, Christopher, Ruben, Rhyse, Khaliq, Luis and Thomas.

Savion Agard was 13 he when arrived as a freshman in Westport. The Mathiases’ daughter Nicole was 6.

“We knew there would be adjustments, but Savion was to be treated as a member of the family — not a guest we entertained,” Kim recalls.

“In our family we say grace before meals. At the end of the prayer we give each other a light kiss. I was concerned about how Savion would feel.”

Nicole defused any discomfort when she blew him a kiss across the table. The ice was broken.

Savion proved a great fit for the family.

“He was easy-going — probably too easy-going when it came to his studies in the first year or so,” Kim reports.

Eventually, he found his way academically and socially.  An older ABC scholar introduced Savion to rugby, which gave him a great group of friends and plenty of confidence.

When Savion Agard graduated from Cornell, the Mathias family was there. From left: Kim, Nick, Savion, Nicole and Mark.

When Savion Agard graduated from Cornell University in 2011, the Mathias family was there. From left: Kim, Nick, Savion, Nicole and Mark.

“We watched Savion mature from a somewhat overwhelmed freshman trying to figure out how to manage his studies and all the ABC expectations placed on him, to a sophomore more comfortable with his ‘I’m not from here’ persona, to a junior who was comfortable at Staples, to a senior who had made friends and found a place for himself in the Class of 2007,” Kim says.

When a 2nd-grade friend saw a family photo and asked who Savion was, Nicole said, “That’s my big brother Savion.” The little girl wondered why he was a different color.

Instantly, Nicole replied, “You don’t have to be the same color to be a family.”

Kim was thrilled. “Neither Mark nor I had ever said those words to Nicole. She just knew it, because that was what we were living.”

A year after Savion became Nicole’s big brother, she became a big sister to her foster (now adopted) brother Nick. He and Savion developed a special relationship. It deepened after graduation.

When Savion returned to Westport to visit or work, he lived with Mathiases. The kids treated him as a rock star, racing to tackle him as he walked through the door. He calls every birthday and Christmas. Email and Facebook enable constant communication.

Some of the ABC alumni gathered for a reunion. Many visit Westport whenever they can.

ABC alumni gather for a reunion. Many visit Westport whenever they can.

After Savion went on Cornell — he’s now an IT headhunter in California — the Mathiases tried to adjust to not having a high school student in the house. (Helping him move to college, and visiting him regularly, proved to be great practice for when the Mathiases own kids are that age, Mark noted.)

In 2010, ABC asked if the Mathiases would again be a host family. They asked Savion what he thought. “Being part of your family was the highlight of my experience with ABC,” he said. The Mathiases were thrilled.

Their closeness with Savion made them concerned about replicating the experience — until they met Khaliq.

“We realized he would be a wonderful addition to our family too,” Kim says. “What a testament to ABC that they find such fine young men.”

Khaliq joins Nick, Kim, Nicole and Mark Mathias for an Easter family portrait.

Khaliq joins Nick, Kim, Nicole and Mark Mathias for an Easter family portrait.

Like Savion, Khaliq is strongly motivated.

“I attended one of the best middle schools in Georgia. I could probably go to one of the best high schools in Georgia too,” he told friends of the Mathiases.

“But when you realize that Georgia’s education system ranks 47th in the nation you think ‘big deal, my best-ranked school is  still in a school system that’s 47th in the US.  That’s when I thought maybe I should look elsewhere for my education.”

Kim says, “That’s impressive thinking at any age. It’s really impressive when you consider Khaliq was 13 years old.”

Khaliq’s academic transition to Westport was smooth. As a freshman he  dropped his free period, to add  Algebra 2.

By sophomore year Khaliq knew everyone, and everyone knew him. He was in a variety of clubs, played volleyball and  had an active social life.

This year, as a junior, Khaliq is a leader in student government and other school and extracurricular activities, while juggling what many would finding a crushing load of AP classes. Through it all, Kim says, “Khaliq maintains his balance, his cool, and his warm smile.”

When Savion Agard returned for last year's A Better Chance of Westport Dream Event, he visited the Mathiases -- and Khaliq.

When Savion Agard returned for last year’s A Better Chance of Westport Dream Event, he visited the Mathiases — and Khaliq.

The Mathiases’ journey with Khaliq continues to unfold. Nicole and Nick both call him their brother – sometimes still confounding classmates.

But there’s no confusion among the Mathiases, or anyone at ABC House. They know there are many ways to be a family.

(And many ways to be a host family — including substitutes, when the regular host family is away. ABC House is always on the lookout for more volunteers. For information, email radydian@optonline.net or nyates@post.harvard.edu.)

Channeling George Washington — And Stevan Dohanos

George Washington really did sleep here.

But that’s not what today’s we-missed-President’s Day-by-a-day post is about.

It’s about the famous “Washington Crossing the Delaware” painting — and what famed (and cited-just-Sunday-on-”06880″) Westport illustrator Stevan Dohanos did with it.

"George Washington Crossing the Delaware" by Stevan Dohanos

This is the Saturday Evening Post cover of February 24, 1951. It comes courtesy of former Westporter Bill Banks, who posted it on Facebook.

And here’s the back story, courtesy of the Saturday Evening Post webpage. (Believe it or not, they’re still publishing. Who knew?)

It is daunting to consider the work realist painter Stevan Dohanos put into this painting. Reproducing images of over a dozen students (and their teacher) with meticulous detail should have been artistic challenge enough, but duplicating Emanuel Leutze’s famous 1850 painting is mind-boggling.

Much has been criticized about Leutze’s Washington Crossing the Delaware: “The crossing was at night (not daytime)”; “That particular version of the flag came later”; and “Washington was only in his 40s and not the elderly man we see here”; to name a few.

While the historical inconsistencies are worth noting, the huge 21-by-12-foot painting of that 1776 Christmas night is still a magnificent accomplishment and a tribute to a critical turning point in American history. The painting today is part of the collection of the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City.

From 1942 to 1958 Dohanos painted 123 Post covers, which can be viewed in our online gallery or at art.com.

Happy birthday, George! (It’s Friday).

And congratulations, Stevan. Your work lives on.

Snowy Sidewalks

You know those sidewalks still clogged with snow?

Westport’s Code of Ordinances spends 3 pages talking about who’s responsible for removing it, where they can put it, and what happens if they don’t.

A few highlights:

Removal of Snow and Ice. The owner, occupant or person in charge of any parcel or lot which fronts upon or abuts any sidewalk, paved trail, walking path or similar facility (hereinafter throughout this chapter referred to as “sidewalk”) shall keep such sidewalk clear of all snow and ice. If snow accumulates on the sidewalk due to natural means or by any other means, the sidewalk shall be cleared of all accumulated snow and ice within 24 hours from the time the snow ceases to accumulate on the sidewalk. Sidewalks are to be kept clear of snow and ice to a minimum of four feet in width. If ice has formed on any sidewalk in such a manner that it cannot be removed, the owner, occupant or person in charge of the parcel or lot which fronts upon or adjoins the sidewalk shall keep the sidewalk sprinkled with sand or salt to permit safe travel by pedestrians.

Post Road store owners are responsible for their sidewalks. So is everyone else in town. (Photo by Katherine Hooper)

Post Road store owners are responsible for clearing snow from their sidewalks. So is everyone else in town. (Photo by Katherine Hooper)

Encroachment Into Street or Onto Sidewalks. No person shall push, shove, or in any way deposit any snow or ice onto any public highway, road, street, public or private sidewalk, or public lands dedicated to public use, except for parcels or lots located where existing buildings are constructed within five feet of the street right-of-way and the sidewalks exist from the Town right-of-way to the curb line. In such instances, the owner, occupant or employee of the owner or occupant of the parcel or lot shall be permitted to deposit snow and ice from the sidewalk onto the public street.

The “Town Administrator” must provide written notice — hand-delivered or mailed — for non-compliance. If the town removes the snow or ice, the owner will be billed.

Gatsby Gala A No-Go

The Westport Library’s “Great Gatsby Party” scheduled for tonight has been postponed to the spring. “Too many complications due to the snow,” organizers say.

Looks like Westporters will be mixing their own gin martinis tonight.

Gatsby

If A Tree Falls…

A good friend and native Westporter — who, for obvious reasons, wishes to remain anonymous — writes:

A tree on my property falls on yours.

Who is legally and morally responsible for the cleanup and costs of removal, property damage if any,  etc.? I realize there might be 2 different answers.

I am sure it happened a lot early Thursday morning, and many in the area are trying to figure it out.

Mark Mathias' tree landed on his own lawn Thursday morning. But what if his tree fell on his neighbor's property? Or vice versa?

Mark Mathias’ tree landed on his own lawn Thursday morning. But what if his tree fell on his neighbor’s property? Or vice versa?

A neighbor’s 35-foot evergreen fell on our property. It missed our house. But the neighbor refused to pay for the cost of removal of any tree “stuff” on our property, as their insurance company  says falling trees are an act of God. (What if I am an aethiest?)  What does an insurance policy have to do with what is the right thing to do?

Our neighbor’s tree service cut the trunk to the point where it crossed over the property line, and no further.

We paid $400 to remove it from our property. This is less about the money, but about the principle.

And what does all this say for neighborly relations?

Good questions, all. Readers, hit “Comments” to reply. Please, keep the discussion civil and sane.

It’s All Downhill From Here

Last month, “06880″ reported on Noah Arthurs.

The 16-year-old son of Westport RTM representative Lee Arthurs had recently set an American speed record for blind-folded Rubik’s Cube solving: 41.96 seconds.

That was just a warmup.

Now — as an ABC News video shows — the talented teenager quickly finished the Rubik’s Cube behind his back.

While skiing.

Noah Arthurs Rubiks Cube

The hardest part, he said, was that his fingers were cold.

Of course, Noah is not perfect.

It took him 3 tries.

Maybe because the 1st two — off by just a few pieces — were on black diamond runs.

(Click here for an even more astonishing video, in which Noah reveals his “secret.” Not that you or I can understand — let alone replicate — it.)

Comments On “Comments”: An “06880″ Plea

Sunday’s “06880″ post — based on a reader’s request for insights into the Westport and Weston school systems — elicited plenty of reasoned, insightful and well-written responses. The online discussion was thoughtful, nuanced and robust.

Lately, that’s a rarity.

The “Comments” section here too often resembles the Wild West — not Westport.

This rendering of the new Y unleashed a torrent of hostility -- much of it anonymous.

This rendering of the new Y unleashed a torrent of hostility — much of it anonymous.

Everyone knows that every Westporter has an opinion about everything. Taxes, education, transportation, downtown, infrastructure, recreation, Winslow Park, Baron’s South — if it exists, we’re experts on it.

One of the reasons I started “06880″ nearly 4 years ago was to be able to express my opinions about my hometown.

And to give everyone else — those who grew up here, live here now, or somehow wander through this town (or site) — a chance to express theirs, too.

One of the founding tenets of “06880″ was that anonymous comments were okay. The First Amendment is a powerful force (though it does not apply to private blogs), and from the beginning readers took advantage of the option for anonymity to toss in their 2 cents’ worth.

Some were private citizens, eager to talk but worried what their friends and neighbors might think. Others were town officials, happy for a chance to chime in without bringing their names and titles into the discussion.

But — month by month, year by year — the thoughtful anonymous commenters have been elbowed aside by trolls. Bozos. Haters.

Troll -- or "06880" commenter?

Troll — or “06880″ commenter?

Those are not my descriptions. They’re yours — expressed to me in emails, by readers frustrated that the comments section has devolved into a mud pit of finger-pointing, name-calling and real nastiness.

I have always responded the same way to those emails: “I am a firm believer in the First Amendment. I don’t like what some people say, but I defend their right to say it. I’m keeping the ‘anonymous’ option open.”

Three recent stories, though — two on gun control (right after Newtown, and on Monday), the other on the Y (really, just 3 architectural drawings of the new building) — may be a tipping point.

Scott Smith — who always comments using his real name, alias-sounding though it is — emailed me:

I know you don’t agree, but I think the policy of allowing anonymous posters devalues what has become a vital community resource.

I know full well the online trusim that uninhibited commenting results in an inexorable drive to the lowest common denominators among us. Trolls, crackpots, hatemongers and the uninformed always come to dominate and ultimately drive out the more insightful people who might wish to add their views.

I see it as a shame as I, perhaps naively, wish for more enlightened discussion among a group I willingly choose to be a part of. But who wants to 1) stoop to their level, 2) get attacked personally, or 3) engage in an unfair debate?

Not me, and it seems, increasingly, many other loyal, intelligent denizens of “06880.” Though many of your own items are wonderfully insightful and uplifting, the comments on your blog are all too often just the opposite.

Scott noted that when he argued in the comments section for a policy in which commenters could use pseudonyms only with my blessing, and for a reason, he was attacked by an anonymous person — and his place of employment cited.

He said — and others have, too — that serious commenters no longer contribute their thoughts. They’ve been driven away by the level of vitriol.

Another commenter who believes "06880" is Number One.

Another commenter who believes “06880″ is Number One.

Scott acknowledges that “the unbridled free-for-all of anonymous commenting can be fun and liberating. Certainly revealing. I know you like a certain amount of free-spirited rabble-rousing.

“But like most libertarian exercises, the end result is usually excess, anarchy and ultimately negative consequences. Sadly, we are not an altogether enlightened species. Too often, dumb and dumber triumph over good and gooder.”

Scott admits he’ll “probably keep checking in on ’06880′ every day. There is too much good stuff on it, from you and occasionally from others.” But he may not check the comments.

Or, he says, “I may join the dark side and start posting anonymously. (I bet I would be vicious.)”

Neither solution is appealing, he says. So he turns to me for the answer.

Thanks a lot.

I’m not sure of the solution. Personally approving every comment would take far too much time — and because of the lag, it would kill the real-time conversation that can make a blog like this so valuable.

I could ban certain commenters. Again, more work for me. (And not foolproof.)

I could require names. But I’ve seen blogs that do that, and the discussions on them are about as lively as a Trappist monastery.

This is not how I want to spend my time.

This is not how I want to spend my time.

I could sweep through the comments section every so often, deleting those I deem overly nasty, personal, unsubstatiated or whatever. But that too takes time. Plus the comments would already have been seen. Plus it seems way too school-marmish for me.

There may be a way to have commenters register, with their names and emails, before posting. It’s an extra step or 2 for the commenters — though time they could use to compose their thoughts logically, perhaps? — but that’s not foolproof either. It’s not always easy verifying which names are real.

So maybe the burden isn’t on me after all. Maybe it’s on you. Maybe, as we head into a new year, readers’ resolutions should be to call off the attack dogs. To play nice. To use your inside voices.

I want the “comments” section to remain an important part of “06880.” I want this online community to really feel like a community — not a dysfunctional family. I want, above all, to keep allowing people to comment.

But I may not be able to. My new year’s resolution is to not get another email like the one I got from Scott Smith.

Or the many similar ones I got before his, from readers who no longer feel welcome at “06880.”

Ghosts Of Christmases Past

I’m a sucker for Christmas.

Sure, it’s become an overly commercialized, hopelessly hyped holiday — one that, Jon Stewart hilariously points out, has morphed from celebrating some guy’s “birthday,” on through “12 days,” and now threatens to gobble up Thanksgiving.

But in many ways this is still the most won-der-ful time of the year. Warm gatherings ’round fires, brightly lit windows, wreaths up the wazoo — Westport glows and dazzles during December.

(Photo by Mike Lauterborn/Westport News)

(Photo by Mike Lauterborn/Westport News)

Still, some of our celebrations can’t hold a candle to Christmases past.

Back in the day — at least, this is how I dimly remember it — dozens of decorated trees stood atop Compo Shopping Center.

In the middle of Main Street, Gene Hallowell lowered the hydraulic lifts at his downtown Mobil station. He covered them with tablecloths, cooked up meatballs and other comfort food, and hosted everyone for a day-long feast. You didn’t have to be a customer to share in the Hallowell holiday cheer.

At least one downtown Christmas tradition remains. Tomorrow (Saturday), Staples’ Orphenians will carol downtown. Their joyful music more than makes up for the fact that Main Street has not yet fully recovered from Hurricane Sandy.

George Weigle conducts the Orphenians on Main Street, circa 1981.

George Weigle conducts the Orphenians on Main Street, circa 1981.

If you want to see this great a cappella group, they start at 2 p.m. in front of Gene Hallowell’s old Mobil station.

Or, as we now call it: Vineyard Vines.

(Do you remember an old Westport holiday tradition? Click “Comments” to share.)